Wow

Wow its been awhile since ive been here..just been busy with life I guess...

School has started...Sara although shes been enjoying 1st grade has already tried to "stay home" a couple of days lol...its actually kinda funny.

Shes got a new best friend...Katie who lives across the street...shes a bit obsessed with her but I think sooner or later shell get bored lol...

ive finally got my Geodon so im feeling better now mentally....hope it keeps up...I was almost ready to go to the hospital again....

I LOVE MY FAMILY....just wanted to say that lol...

Aug 10th

Not too much going on...I do have two major concerns...took Sara to the dentist because shes been complaining about her left jaw hurting her...well it was way worse than we thought...shes going to need I think 12 or so procedures on 7 beginnings of cavities....tiny ones but will get worst...they quoted 1400+ dollars for all...thats NOT including the gas...and they DONT give the child a seditive before either...she totally freaked out when they were trying to do x-rays....didnt like the rest of it...I think she wont be able to do any work at that place....will have to find someone else who does things differently.

Next....went to the pharm to pick up Geodon which is on hold till Sept 3rd or so....I dont have enough of what ive got to last that long....I cant stop taking my geodon because I will start to see and hear things again, it started happening when I cut the dose awhile back so I know it will again if I run out...WTF am I gonna do....anyway guess it will work out...

Also my weight loss has stalled because my fat ass cant stop carb binging....lost only 5lbs since i started...gotta do better...will tonight because....well just because.

This pic is of me and my husband, its a bit old but I love it!!!

Aug 4th

Not much going on...but wanted to post. I still cant "follow" other people on here, it keeps signing me out...its very annoying!!!!

Woke up to ants crawling all in my purse....after some coughdrops....we have them so bad this year....fuc*ing horrible.....we are killing them all the time and Robert has some stuff for the yard I found out but has never put it out to kill things like that...although we get them every summer when its hot and havent had rain, but this year is the worst for them.

Sara had a good B-Day....she loves her guitar lol...

Guess thats all...didnt go to my appt on the 2nd, was too tired from not sleeping at all the night before....so its this monday instead...cant miss this one.

My lil one will be six

Well actually its after midnight so she already is....HAPPY BIRTHDAY SARA BUGS!!!

Right now ive got a headache from hell...nothings helping it...

Tomorrow I see my PDoc and will be getting refills on my crazy meds...yeah i take them so I can call them crazy meds...anyway wanna see if theres something else than lithium I can take...it makes me gain a crazy amount of weight crazy fast!!! Ive not taken it for awhile now tho...but I do know that I need more than just what I take....anyway...thats about it...

It got up to 111F today...well I mean yesterday....anyway too freakin hot for this fat lady!

Wow & wow

A couple days in the hospital and eating what i want and wow is all I can say....did really good but wham, not anymore...restarting today...yeah i am....btw hospital food is so bad for you...i mean they act like they are feeding you good but everything is high high carb so it puts the weight on...anyway

Got a call from someone I know that I met in the hospital...yeah the nut house one....he was super sweet and seemed okay pretty much...but after the last phone call i got from him hes totally weirded me out....not only did he say hes been in and out of the hospital...which that in itself isnt really bad...when ya need help ya need help....but when he called me he told me to leave my husband and marry him....hes been sent to a boarding home...thats what he called it anyway....and i think he thinks i will save him....even told me in a creepy way that he wanted to marry me and have sex with me....good Lord he sure dont know me well cause sex is the furthest thing from my mind even with my husband atm.... anyway not going to take anymore calls from him....he was sweet and innocent enough till THAT!!!! Totally creeped me out!!!! He called yesterday morning at 7 something but  my phone was only on vibrate and it didnt wake anyone up and I sure didnt want to talk to him after what he said...even if i were single i wouldnt, i mean ive always known hes a bit....childish i guess....or childlike rather....but i cant and never could take care of a grown adult like that....i dont know what to do with myself and my own mental health issues half the time...

Must go my almost 6 year old is famished lol....and its only 8:30 in the morning....

Will try to post more often

Bad then good

Why doesnt blogger allow me to add ppls sites, join, whatever its called...every time I leave my page to see someones it logs me out...I wanna read other ppls blogs on a regular basis damnit!

And the good thing....although I caved a wee bit during a sleepless night, I did lose two lbs!!! YIPPEEE

Day one down

Although my first "eating" wasnt healthy, I did really well today....grabbed one glazed donut after feeling almost sick with major tummy growls and later ate two servings of strawberry yogurt....thats it....some ppl make say wow thats alot of cals and carbs and yes it is but ya got nooooooooooooo idea how much this fat chic usually eats...wish me luck for day two.....LUCK